Business in the front...

So it dawned on me (even though vince says it to me all the time) that I tend not to think beyond what is in front of me. What?! I know. How can that be?! But I have finally admitted that I do not think about the business of working in a corporation. The politics...the strategy...the planning. All the stuff that goes on all the time, other than the day to day job you are doing. I mean, people are posturing, setting up, being all tricky. And there I am la-di-da-di-da-ing in my little cube. I pay far too much attention to my actual job than to working. Strange I know. I wish I was a just out of college person. Give me a dose of real life experience please.

So...from now on, there will be a little bit of the "business in the front" thought going on. planning for my career path. Reading between the lines. And of course, keeping up with the day to day. *sigh* working is now harder.

Happy post Thanksgiving!

Spent Thanksgiving in Vegas with the parentals (Lin) and brother Greg. Interesting. My first holiday in Vegas. We arrive Tuesday night and planned to leave Friday so as to avoid the super expensive hotel pricing.

Fun times. Vegas was super empty when we arrived. Seemed quite surreal. And I actually liked it! not crowds. No lines. awesome!! but yes...not as much energy.

Didn't do much. i have to admit that my "vegas vacationing" style has altered from my youth. Gone are the times of hotel/club hopping, loose gambling and late night into early morning drinking (wait! did those times ever happen?). Sign me up for the one stop shop. nice hotel, gambling/spa downstairs, great club and shopping inside. we spent a lot of time walking around to our destination and not as much time at the destination.

We went to visit the Wynn hotel. The buffet was really great! great tasting. good times for thanskgiving dinner. but other than that, the hotel was a bit of a mystery for me. Sure it was new and nice...but i had trouble figuring out the overall theme of the hotel. I'd definitely go there to eat...but my hotel of choice is still Bellagio. oh...the wonderful soothing fountain show. and the beautiful conservatory and gallery. Oh.. and you can't beat the celebrity (poker) sightings. Gus Hansen sure seems taller on tv. Johnny Chan...looks exactly the same in person and on tv.

it's good to be home.

bah bah baaaaahhhhhh!

after sometime now...Arrowhead is gone.

:(

it was actually sad. He is no longer working with me. I thought things were getting better. But apparently I was incorrect. I hadn't had much interaction with him since my last post. but it was seemingly just because there was just no project to work on together. But I guess I was wrong.

So it's sad because I thought there was more I could do. Or at least more effort that I could have tried. Maybe I could have talked to him more directly. Maybe I could have been more compassionate. Either way, the saga is over. I know now (thanks to Vince!) that there could have been more that I could have said or done. Now that there is no more time to do anything. I do wish Arrowhead well. Really. I do.

Arrowhead update:

So...after my talk with Arrowhead. I was pretty optimistic. and then i got a message saying people in his group were seeing improvement. so i was even more optimistic!!

*sigh* alas...i fear that i am wrong yet again.

thought i told him, in no uncertain terms: "I need you to do _____." "I have been expecting ____ from you, is that not correct? Should I not be expecting ____ from you?" (please forgive the blanks. I'm trying to maintain some respect for Arrowhead)

Lo and behold...not so much than 2 weeks passes that Arrowhead is back to his same old pattern. He asks me to do ____. He asks my colleagues to do _____. i don't get it! does he not want to do it because he doesn't know how? if so, then say so and then we can help or go from there. everything seems to point to he does not choose to do ____. whether it is b/c he doesn't know how or doesn't want to, he just chooses not to. *sigh* what are going to do with him??

my colleague met him. and i try not to think it's my influence, but she thinking he's creepy. i don't think he's creepy. i just think he's a bit odd.

anyhow, i haven't seen improvement. i haven't seen anything. so if seeing nothing = improvement...then there it is!! ok. sorry. i just think that when people expect to see something of him, he just doesn't show anything so it looks like improvement b/c it's not anything else. i have come to the point where i have to actively jot down notes of our interactions and how I see his interactions so that I can think about whether there is improvement. *sigh* that was not a part of my job description.

one thing that bugged...we are working on this project and for the longest time it was the kind that "should be done as soon as possible." somehow, it turned into "should get done before the end of September." to that end, Arrowhead was calling all these meetings and making a big uproar about getting people together and getting things done. when it wasn't looking to be done by then, i thought, what happened in the last two weeks that brought to this "hair on fire situation" and so I Arrowhead why the end of September deadline as opposed to as soon as possible. of course, and this is what bugged...there was no reason for the end of September deadline. at least no reason that Arrowhead shared with me. so why the push on everyone including me, my colleagues, my managers, and other people's managers?

then later i learned that Arrowhead might be working on some sort of quota system.

i'm not liking the slick things that i learn about Arrowhead. he says one thing. but there's a whole story behind what he says that he doesn't let people know. tricky slicky.

ok! It's been too long since I've written. Lots and lots have happened.

my friends anne and john had baby #2!! yea!! congrats. I can't wait to see them and little new max.

vince got to go to NY for work. he does not heart NY. but i think that may be because it was work. i for sure heart NY!!! even though i haven't been there lately. seems like it will take a small fortune to go there are really enjoy the things of NY.

So while vince was in NY. i took an impromptu trip down to LA. fun! i seriously kept thinking "I will not drive down to LA like a madwoman. I am in no rush. I will not drive down to LA like a madwoman." well. didn't work. once i hit the 5 freeway...helllllooooo madwoman. i can't help it. so then on the way back up...I kept reminding myself: "I will not drive like a madwoman back to the Bay Area." of course. my wishful thinking never prevails. I think I must convince myself next time that i HAVE to be safer. and be nicer to my little car.

LA was fun! got to see my family: mom, dad, bro, sis-in-law, nephew, niece, and little nephew. I hadn't seen little nephew in a while. cute as a baby could be. little smileys. apparently equipped with a death grip. my friend tina brought her little guy over and though he is about 1 month younger, got an early lesson of older bullies. somehow mason (my little nephew) and bryson (tina's son) got to holding hands. and then a few second later, brsyon starts crying! nothing changed. no one changed positions. mason was just holding his hand. with his death grip. sorry bryson!!!

fun part was watching a gazillion little kids play soccer. soo funny. some little kids were actually pretty skillful. but for the most part. it was a group of 8 little boys trying to kick the ball in a certain direction.

other things...hmmm...to recap...dinner with friends, wedding and work. doesn't seem like a lot. but it somehow jam packed our last two weekends! this weekend...shopping! no luck. and relaxing. lots of luck.

tune in next week as vince and i meet up and spend the day with our very own personal shopper!! should i be scared that i told her I'm looking for a new wardrobe and i'm pretty open? yikes. maybe just my wallet should be scared!

Work work work...

Seems like these days all i do is work. Not that I'm complaining. Just an observation. Get up. get ready for work. go to work. go eat dinner, maybe go work out. then go home and log in and do more work. then go to sleep. geez. I hope I get a raise. and i don't think a pda for work will help the cause either.

So I had another talk with Arrowhead. I think this one is the winner! I tried to be very clear and say things like: "i don't think we are on the same page as to what it is we expect out of each other." and "I expect you to do this, is that wrong, should I not expect that? do you not know that i expect that?" and then even went as far as to say "I want to see this from you and I haven't been seeing it." of course, i think arrowhead got a little defensive. but all in all it was a fine conversation and I'm hopeful things will change. Not withstanding the several people before me who were probably not as nice about it and much more direct who tried to talk to him about the very same thing, and things have yet to change. *sigh* why do i think i have the magic touch?

but i'm forever hopeful.

fall is coming. the weather is colder and much more windy.

Happy post-Labor Day weekend!
Silly me for thinking during the weekend that it was really long. Come Tuesday morning I kept wishing that it was still the weekend! *sigh*
In between the long working sessions, Vince and I got to head down to Santa Cruz for a spell. My first time at the Boardwalk! Out under the sun. Where we had some fun. The Boardwalk.

It was hot hot hot!!! The place was filled with beautiful colors!!! Although we didn't avail ourselves of the games or food, the booths were quite attractive.

And don't think that we were the only ones there! there were tons of people! Though it was quite tempting to go into the water given the heat, I was reminded that the water there was not as pristine as could be. And, given that I'm from CA and had the privilege of growing up in SoCal about 15 minutes away from the beach, I didn't think I was going to be missing anything.

Our highlight of the day came when we were hanging around some sea lion who were basking away in the sun on a small little floating dock. Most of the time they just relaxed. All hanging around, laying on top of each other. Soo cute! Some of them would stir and move around. There was a little baby one that was so close to the edge and kept getting almost pushed off. All in all, they would stay in their same position with eyes closed. Then... lo and behold! a pelican landed on the one edge of the dock! It was quite an alarming session and the sea lions did not really welcome the intrusion. As you can see, little baby sea lion is not quite oriented. Good thing there are plenty of adults around. and invaded their peaceful slumber! Well, the sea lions did not really like it. And when they were shooed off the dock by a man (booo!) this one showed us how she really felt about the pelican! She was just floating along, swimming around and then out of nowhere... Isn't this one of the most awesome pictures ever! Such natural action! Thanks and Great photography skills Vince!!


What a fun short day. I can see why people like the Boardwalk. It's out in the sun. It's fun. It's the Boardwalk. And I can't believe we actually heard and saw people eating this:

SATC

On another note...this thought just popped into my mind... I actually am looking forward to the Sex and the City movie!! Not that i'll go watch it...maybe. But i'm very curious to know what the plot will be.

I have mixed feeling. Are they going to pick up right where they left off? that seems to boring. They are no longer "single" gals and definitely are a few years older. So i am quite curious. I hope the movie doesn't suck and then taint the feeling towards the series b/c I actually thought the series was well done and wrapped up quite nicely, and very happily.

Hmmm...we'll see...

I fail to understand...

Arrowhead doesn't get it! Our talk today, I thought, was quite productive. We got through the materials we needed to get through, albeit, I'm sure not in the great detail he wanted but certainly more to my liking. I have no problem giving guidance and doing some of the work when necessary. but it seemed like it was not necessary to do all of the work. In any event, I thought the conversation went well when I released some of his binds and said things like: you can do it, use your judgment, you create something and then send it to me to review.

THEN!! I can't believe it! I get an email on this very day saying: "Have situation A. Need you to help create, when next week can we discuss?"

ARGH! I suppose I am being ultra ineffective in my efforts. How can I say: "I cannot hand hold you" or "I cannot do your work for you" or "I cannot do your work with you" without seeming like i'm a crazy bitch or at the very least, non supportive. *sigh* i hope my response to that email can make him get it. all I want to say is "you do the work, you give it to me for review." how come he still thinks that he can "set up a meeting to discuss" when I have nothing to discuss because I have nothing to review and don't know what is going on?

I can only blame myself. I must not be a good communicator.

Visits

How surprising! I got visits from two of my new best friends today! So unexpected. They just...popped in.

Facilities guy came to visit me today. He's very nice. Always carrying some sort of folder with papers and all. He has really only come by to visit me to give me an update as to what he is doing on a particular deal and then to give me a heads up as to what to expect. Pretty cool. I do appreciate that. I feel bad because I don't know his last name. :( I'll try to sneak a peak at his badge the next time he comes. Or all he has to do is email me. which he hasn't yet b/c he opts for the pop in.

IT guy came to visit me. I feared that I would be losing him as a BFF as the project he was supporting me on was nixed and is no more. But hope is revived!! He popped in and talked with me about nothing in particular. Except how his work went on a past project that had a similar fate to the one we were working on together. We will of course have to find other things to talk about after we've exhausted talking about our no longer live project. Also, my cube neighbor also on IT guy's BFF list, is leaving in a few weeks to go work somewhere else. :( I wonder if IT guy will come visit knowing that she is not here anymore. I did not have the heart to tell him that she was leaving. I hope he doesn't get mad when he finds out. :O He won't. IT guys is like Mr. Cool. Nothing seems to phase him.

corporate politics alert!! I will be trying to have a conversation with Arrowhead tomorrow about our working relationship. :S I hate feeling like I'm doing his work! But then again, the question is, am I? Or maybe it's more I wouldn't mind doing what I would do, maybe just after he tried to put in some effort. My example, I told him that he had choice 1 (yellow) or choice 2 (green) and that he would have to choose which one to use. In the end, he sends it back to me for my input while leaving both choices 1 or 2 to select and did not color them yellow or green. *sigh* not only did he not choose, he even seemed to forget that I made them yellow and green so that it could be easier to know what belonged to whatever he was supposed to choose.

I declined a meeting invite he sent. sad b/c it was just for me. I hope I wasn't too rude in my decline. But we have to work out a better relationship here. we'll see what happens! wish me luck!

Lunar Eclipse

Wow. I can't believe I stayed up for this. Okay. I didn't really stay up. I went to sleep at 11pm and woke up at 2:15am. Thereafter I got ready and went downstairs outside my apartment at got ready to take pictures. Granted, I wish I had a tripod and a bigger lens...but I am glad to have gotten to see the beauty and majesty of the lunar eclipse. Even it it happens quite a lot of times. But from what I read, not so common is the total eclipse. Enjoy!

1st shot at 2:40am
subsequent shot at 2:54am:
at 3:15am:
at 3:33am:
at 3:49am:
at 3:59am:
last shot at 4:02am:
although it would have been awesome to see the moon cycle back to full, I just had to go to sleep.

Happy Birthday Sharon!!

YEA!! I hope you have been having a wonderful time celebrating! I don't know how you do it but you have to teach me how you seem to be more graceful and appear more youthful as time goes on. Nice tan too!

Performance Goals

So I'm new to this concept. At my old workplace, there was no formal review period. no setting of goals. things were from the hip and it was alright with me.

Now, working for the Company, it's all about performance, goals and action items.

:)

This place I work is such a interesting social experiment for me! The newest thing to analyze...

Performance and goal setting!

What goals should I set for myself? Do I set low goals so it'll be certain that I can meet and exceed them? Will my manager know I'm low balling the goals and ding me for that? should I be aggressive and set lofty goals and bank on effort being seen rather than results? of course, in a perfect world, i'd set lofty goals and reach them!! but for now, i have no goals. for i joined the Company mid-review period and was told not to set back goals for the 2 months I was working.

will i get a raise? we'll see!!

oh...and the latest on Arrowhead...i met the nicest lady today that, from day 1, has had a terrible time working with Arrowhead. I can confirm now...that it really is him. I thought, maybe some of use are too critical and too bossy or whatever. but this lady was super nice. right off the bat. and for her to have a problem. *sigh*

Evaluations

So I'm now worried about the fate of Arrowhead. Apparently, he's been having some problems dealing with people in the past. It' snot that he's a terrible guy. But it seems that he not quite as effective as he should be and may in fact drag people down with him.

I never really thought about him and his work and its effect on others. but today, a colleague was doing an impromptu review and now i feel bad for him. he has all the best intentions. but for some reason, he cannot turn those intentions into product. my colleague asked me if he had given me some product that he created and worked on. and i can't say that he had. :( i'm racking my brain to think of the positives. not that he has that many negatives. it's just that they sort of overshadow his positives.

it's weird. not until today have i ever really thought about the work performance of someone that i work with. i hate that it's not a great impression. and now i'm worried about Arrowhead. I wish I could help him. i'll try to. i'd appreciate any ideas to help. Or maybe I shouldn't help. Maybe I should just let things happen as they may? oh...these are the days of my life...

New best friend #4

I can't believe I forgot about new best friend #4!! I'm going to call him Arrowhead, for he is deserving of name and I have a bottle of Arrowhead water on my desk and I can't think of anything else right now. You can feel free to suggest some new names as we get to know Arrowhead better.

Arrowhead calls me about 3 times a week and then sends me about 5-7 emails a day on average. Of course, they are not all to me only, but there I am. On all these emails. when sometimes, they don't even concern me. I do appreciate being kept in the loop, but i keep trying to find a way not to unnecessarily bombard someone's email, and I wish Arrowhead could do the same.

It's good though because at least the emails are all work related. It was funny one time as he called me one day, and I didn't pick up the phone. yes. i was screening. and then two seconds after the phone stopped ringing, I got an email that simply said:

"Are you there?"

I was. But to him I wasn't.

In any event, Arrowhead and I get along well. It's not that bad. mostly just funny. But sometimes, I think he just calls me so that he can tell me what he thinks and then sees if I think like he does and then get me on his side so he can turn it around to someone else and say that there is consensus for what he thinks. Okay, that didn't happen to me but to my colleague and so I'm wary of his motivation for calling. It's not as simple as just an exchange of information. Welcome to the world of corporate politics!

I like Arrowhead. Except for the times when i think he's trying to get me to do his work. me don't like that so much. We'll see what happens with Arrowhead. Maybe he'll chill out a little.

My New Best Friends

So in the past several weeks, I made a couple of new best friends. :)

#1 - IT guy - I have new best IT guy friend. he comes to visit me in my cube every so often for no reason at all. sometimes there is a reason. most of the time it is just to say hi. it's a little weird b/c we don't really have anything to talk about other than the project we are both on. But sadly, that project has now been scraped for the time being and I wonder if new best friend #1 will no longer visit me. hmmm...that might be alright. but it's always good to know someone in IT.

#2 - Facilities guy - I met this new best friend only last week and he has come to visit me twice and talk to me about our upcoming dealings with each other. It's cool. He's a little bit easier to talk to than best friend #1 (probably due to my lameness in the IT sector) but still...I don't really know what he's talking about. I do appreciate the heads up, though. And he's the type of guy I could see having a beer with. with a group of people of course.

#3 - Wikipedia - my bestest of all new best friends. Wiki has helped me understand what people say and write to me. I can't tell you how many acronyms have been thrown at me. I have come to rely a lot on Wiki for helping me speak a tiny bit intelligently. I see us having a long lasting relationship. no beers for me and Wiki though.

I do anticipate having more new best friends in the future. It's a big company.

AWESOME! It's sooo close to where we live!!!

mmm....donuts....

There's a disclaimer that says the contents on the box cover are not representative of what is inside the box:

Thank you come again!

Gainful employment!!

Hurray!! The drought has finally been lifted!!! It is truly a work orchestrated by God that brought me to where I am today! On Monday, I start as a full employ where I am at. No more feeling slightly ostracized (of course, only in my head) because of my different badge. No more wondering what will happen. And no more overtime! Okay, maybe that last one was actually kind of good to have.

I know many of you have heard my sad tales throughout this past year. Trying to figure out what to do with my career. Where to work? What to do? When will I find the "right" job?? Well, here is how it all unfolded with a brief recap!

After I moved up here, I got in touch with an old friend of mine. We weren't bosom buddies or anything, but he always seemed like a big brother. Or rather, though he would never say, I was just probably a pesty little sister to him. My friend, was kind enough to recommend me for a project position as a paralegal. Got to get in to the company on that and helped out as much as I could. My contract was initially for 2 months. Then one day...Surprise! I get an email saying that my contract had been extended for one month! woohoo! but then...here is where God comes in and how His timing and His working in people are so awesome.

While I was puttering away doing what I was suppose to do and trying to meet and accost people for lunch...someone in my department had given her notice to quit. She happened to be under my same boss. She happened to be doing something that, in my eyes, was not too difficult for me to pick up. She was doing something, in my boss' eyes, I was overqualified to do. Lo and behold, my boss approached me to see if I was interested in moving into that position!! and of course, i said "OF COURSE!" haha. maybe much too eagerly. so with all companies there is some bureaucracy. after sometime, the position was opened, i went through some interviews, and my boss approved me to move over into the position!!!

In a time where there was no hiring b/c there was some recent lay offs and headcount was frozen and budget belts were being tightened....God brought me to a place and the right time to be able to get to know people and do good work for things to be set up just perfectly when a full time position in the company opened up. I could not have thought it to work out any better! i don't have to move groups, i don't have to move cubes, and i'm just sliding over to doing something much more substantive than what i was doing before. And i get to stay working under the same boss who is really really great.

I'm really excited about all the new opportunities. I get to work on a much more cross-functional basis. I get to still do legal analysis and recommendations. It is very interesting to meet and work with new people. I cannot believe how big my working world is from what it used to be. Still quite an adjustment. and lots of work to be done. not only the day to day...but there is anticipated process overhaul that i get to be a part of! it's really awesome!! i can't believe how fortunate it is for me to have this opportunity. I am very thankful to God and to all those people who helped make this happen.

Tomorrow is my last day as a contractor! Come Monday...hello full time employee who has access to the gym and remote access from home!! Now the questions remains, should I get a company blackberry???

Breaking up is hard to do... (me and my CC company)

We all have credit cards. I happen to be in the process of activating one of mine and closing another one of mine. No particular reasons. Other than the one I was reactivating I have had for a very long time but only use as my emergency card. I'm not too sure what happened to it in the interim, but I ended up opening another account when I moved. Weird. I'm only in the habit of having and using one card. and then having a back up one for emergencies. so i ended up having two for emergencies. weird.

anyhow, as i was trying to activate my old card, i ended up being on hold for the longest time!!! i couldn't to the automatic activate as i was not calling from a landline that was linked to my account. Thus the inevitable music and hold. i tried twice! was on hold for over 10 minutes each time. I know, it's only 10 minutes...but it seemed like forever to be on hold! so anyways, i wasn't too happy with that level of service given that i was trying to ACTIVATE my account so i could start USING it. but alas...i was calling at midnight saturday night...so maybe they were not as well staffed as I had hoped or expected. Lo and behold, the next day my 3rd attempt was golden and i successfully activated my credit card and got an increase in limit! awesome. and yes...only for emergencies.

having done that, i proceeded to cancel and close my other account. reasons why: b/c i just opened the account last year, don't really use them and simply wanted to stay with the card I had had for longer. the customer service number gave me no option to auto cancel my account. and here's the reason why...the "what can we do to keep you" tactic. i had to talk to my account rep and there was the tenacious effort to convince me not to close my account. and i remind you, there was not compelling reason for me to do so. simply put...i had too many credit cards and wanted to close one of them. then came the barrage of questions. some appropriate, others, i thought, very inappropriate, and all in all a bit annoying. here's my paraphrase of the questions:

Why do you want to close your account?
Is there anything we can do to make this card work better for you?
Do you have other credit cards?
Do you other credit cards give you rewards or incentives to use them?
How are we different from your other cards?
Why are you choosing to stay with them and not us?
Do you have a balance on your other cards?
Are interests rates important to you?

After the third time I had to say "i just want to close my account" I was getting a little peeved. why can't i just want to do something for no reason that is any of your business?!! i know, they are just doing their jobs...but seriously...i just want to close my account. if i had a problem with the card and with the services, then i'd say something. but really...i just have one card too many and i'm sorry...but yours gets closed. *sigh* i think i said "I just want to close my account" ten times and i was almost to the point where i wanted to say "i love my other card, i have used the 2nd emergency card before so i know them...I have never used you and don't know you so let me just close my account!!!!" After the 10th time, the rep quickly stated: "ok, your account is cancelled." almost in a manner so i wouldn' t hear it. and when i asked for confirmation of the closing, he seemed very reluctant. not such a great tactic to set things up for eventually trying to lure me back, i should say. if it's that hard to close up, i don't have a very good impression of them overall. just cut me loose. i'm not a money maker for them anyways.

lesson learned: the credit card company offers you a whole bunch (of what could be nothing) if you call them and tell them you want to close your account. too bad in this situation, i just wanted to close. nothing they said could have kept me. hehe..unless they paid me to keep it open. haha.

i must say though...i LOVE my credit card that i use all the time. they are so ON. even when it's me that using my card, they will stop transactions when they suspect something is not normal. awesome. not an annoyance at all. i'm very grateful for them doing so and they are really nice about things. emergency card has been good too. way to make me feel good to increase my limit upon my activation of my new card. yes...i know they are trying to sucker me into to using more and owing them. but alas! touche! i'm not going to!

As there is No Cable

So many of you might not know...but we have been living without cable tv for quite a while now. No matter...we were plenty busy with the internet and the tv shows you watch online. I have to say, I went a little crazy with the shows and ended up watching almost every conceiveable show there was to watch online. I found great shows like "brothers and sisters" on abc...to not as great shows like "search for the next pussycat doll." but hey...at that time i wasn't working. and i do love my tv.

but now that it's rerun time...no shows to watch. so we've once again, resorted to dvds. tho i have been know to gether dvds here and there...i don't think i've bought a new dvd in about a year. so we've been having some fun watching the same dvds over and over again.

this week's hit of the household: O Brother Where Art Thou. what a wonderful movie! george clooney like you've never seen him before (unless you saw him on the Facts of Life). far from debonair, but nonethless, enthralling to watch. this movie is so great! loads of great quotes and facial expressions. lots of allegory. i can only wish there was some insightful commentary by the directors or the writers of the movie. but alas, we are left to interpret it on our own. the images are quite stunning. and it's so fun to watch!!! i might start getting tired of it in a few days. but for now....i'll leave you with our favorite quotes from the movie:

vince: "Ohhh... mercy yes...we got to beat that competition."

judy: "...and stay out of the Woolsworth!"

Down Time

So I finally have stolen away some down time to blog. I know you all must have forgotten about me and thought I may have fell off the face of the earth. Nope. Still here. Vince is sleeping so it's just me. I thought I would turn off the TV (I think I've watched all my dvds a gazillion times anyways) and thought about turning off the computer but took a moment to touch base with my blog.

Since I wrote last time lots of things, of course, have happened. In no particular order...went to a wedding which was loads of fun! Of course, most of the fun was watching the groom and his deteriorating but fun behavior due to alcohol consumption. By the end of the night, which by the way was only 11pm, he needed two guys to prop him up and take him up to the couch. Where he lay with a half smile on his face and making weird poses with his arms as they were the only parts of his body not being supported by the couch. He was such fun and a great cooperative drunk. He even made his 6am flight out the next morning! If only I could be cooperative when I'm that gone...

Still working. I may have an update on that soon. But I really am enjoying where I am working, what I am doing, the people that I work with and, surprisingly, am very eager for more. I used to think I didn't care about what I did. But being in an entirely different industry makes me realize that there are some things on which I would rather spend my work day doing. And it is really great to be surrounded by people who strive to be on the cutting edge of what they do. Not only is the subject matter of what I do quite interesting and novel to me, even the workplace itself is pretty awesome.

If you didn't know, I came from a wonderful small law firm atmosphere that thoroughly enjoyed. But being in a big corporation with all these differently trained people and lots of hoops to jump through, is quite an experience. I didn't not know I would have to be so interactive and so nice. I mean, I am nice. and I still think I'm an extrovert...but working with others sometimes takes a lot of effort. Some of my thoughts during the day: "Why is it that I have to say the same thing over and over again? Why is it that even though I say something multiple times in multiple ways, you still don't get it? Am I speaking English?" Okay, that last one is actually a legitimate inquiry because sometimes I'm communicating with international people.

And speaking of international, I discovered (new to me that is) a new island! The island of Mauritius is my new favorite place to talk about! We all know that the island of Madagascar is off the coast of Africa, right? But did we all know that the island of Mauritius is off the coast of Madagascar?!? Not I! I keep telling people that I need to go visit some of our international entities to make sure they are in compliance. :) But alas, my suggestions have fallen on deaf ears. So one revelation of mine...I'm not as culturally correct as I thought myself to be. I am soo western-centric it's amazing. My apologies to all you internationals out there. I will try to be more sensitive to the world cultures. I still have a lot of learning to do.

Anyhow, I think I puked into this blog way to much. I will try to be better at being more consistent.

Working!

So, if you've noticed...I haven't been writing on the blog. Sorry about that. Haven't had much time lately... I have a job!! For the time being anyhow. I'm trying to be pretty diligent in learning my new industry and new workplace. It's all very much a great lesson in life! When it settles down...I'll be sure to fill you in on all the details!!

stay tuned...

Rubbing elbows with Celebrities

Ok...maybe not a celebrity in the sense...but Vince did (or could have literally) rubbed elbows with Senator John McCain. Vince is involved with a group at Google that invites authors of all sorts to talk about their book. They have had many authors come by...but this time...media press and everything!!! The authors get a chance to talk about their book, answer questions about their book or other things, sign their book, and get to have the session broadcasted on...you guessed it...Youtube! Check it out on Youtube.

We are in the process of building our library of books from authors that have visited. I can't wait to read Senator McCain's book. The one we have is called "Faith of my Fathers." It's a family memoir. I just got done with Carly Fiorina's memoir: "Tough Choices." I like reading memoirs. It's interesting to read about lessons learned from one's life. I should turn that into a love for reading the Bible, yeah? As that is the ultimate memoir. But I digress. So many books, so little time. It will be intriguing to read about Senator McCain's experiences with war and the lessons he learned from his father.

It's cool to know that Google provides a forum for authors to commentate on their books and answer questions. Cool gig Vince! Can't wait to hear about what author comes next!

The Drought is Over!!!

The ride has ended. I am officially gainfully employed in what was somewhat my livelihood!!

Hurray! Thank God. I do not have to look for jobs next week!!! Who knows about later on...but I am superbly happy that I do not have to look for jobs or make follow up phone calls next week!!!

I'm sure I will dwell on my situation more and more next week. But I am happy to report that I have found and accepted a job offer. Not the most perfect job offer. It's a temporary assignment...but it is the opportunity I was looking for!!! And hope to make permanent!

So it seems that when I finally committed myself to one direction, still of course being nervous and anxious that I might fail and it would be a hard road ahead...I have found blessing and success. Do I attribute it to God's works?? Of course. Do I think He was holding out on me until this precise moment?? Well, I'm sure I had to face some things about myself before I could be ready for what is in store for me ahead.

By God's orchestration...my new appointment in life started in early April. I was trying to reconnect with some people I knew in the legal field in the area. I was so blessed to find friend from the past. I had known this friend since my high school days and it was a joy to learn where life had taken him throughout the years. With divine intervention, my friend's helping hand, and some humility and just a smidgen of boldness, I soon found myself sitting in an interview for a position with my friend's company. Of course, I was not interviewing for the position of my dreams...but what I was hoping for, was a chance. a small chance that they would give me the opportunity to do anything with and for them, only to hope to make some space to wow and dazzle them. What happened... well, I was so fortunate to interview with a gentleman who, in the 30 minutes I spoke with him, I found to be very understanding and sincere. What started out as a small scrap of effort to convey my willingness to do anything for them, turned into a chance to work at a great company in whatever capacity I could possibly handle when I get there. I am so very grateful for the opportunity. I was so excited about the opportunity I literally jumped for joy. No more job hunting! Embarking on a super exciting opportunity in what is somewhat a new career for me!!

But with the elation comes a little bit of fear and dread. Yes...of course. But it's all really good. I haven't been this excited about any of my previous job offers. The possibility of failure and the impending dread should only make me perform to my utmost, right. There is something to be said about being exited and eager to go to work. There is of course something to be said about feeling like you can't rise to the challenge and it pushed you to do so. The possibility of me tackling things I have no idea how to do...100%! Scary thought. I started to think that in this year of not working...I have almost forgotten how to work. Hope it's like riding a bike...that you never forget. Actually, I almost forgot how to ride a bike...you may have gotten that from a previous entry. Ha ha. In any event...This is a time for me to buckle down. Work my a** off and really soak up and spew back out the experience before me. I know it won't be easy. But I know that I can put my full effort to making this new job work. And I know that God will be behind me to give me the strength I need---whether it be the people and resources around me at work...or vince at home constantly encouraging me...or all of you who think and pray for me. I am utterly grateful for our connection and that we have the bond that we do.

Here's to working hard...for what counts!

cute things continue...

vitamin water and mini-vitamin water

Happy Anniversary for Vince and Me!!!

Yea!!! We made it to our one year anniversary!!! Thoughts for us this year... it went by pretty fast and yet not fast. This for us was a year of adjustment. Of course...since we had a long distance relationship when we were together...being together was very much of an adjustment. Living with someone else and coordinating schedules was not always that easy. But good for us...we are both still in one piece and have learned much about the other person and our habits. We also wondered...since this was a year of adjustment, whether we had put things on hold in light of other things not being in place. But while it seemed like we did, in actuality, all of the things that could have happened...probably wouldn't have happened anyway. So it seems that the mentality was to put things on hold...but in actuality...things unfolded or will unfold in it's time.

We had a wonderful dinner for our anniversary. We actually had a wonderful weekend. Lots of relaxing. Swimming, exercising, seeing friends. All in all the best things. The weather was spectacular. we got to go to alexander's steakhouse in cupertino. of course, in vince's opinion, not as great food as forbes...so i was called in for an opinion. i have to say...the food there was great! really great!!! the crowd there was good...not too busy and not too empty. it was cool to see the chef in the kitchen for there was a glass partition where you could see him...and i think even a bar and stools on the other side to actually watch. i must say...our server...andrew...was the best! he was super nice and very polite and kept bringing us out little treats!! overall...the steak itself was not as tasty as forbes...but the dining experience was stellar!!! i would have to say even better than at forbes (although it was a monday night when we dined at forbes; yet forbes was darker in lighting and seemed a bit more old school steakhouse).

ok, here's the play by play:

andrew asked if there was any special occasion and so we told him it was our anniversary. i have to wonder if they do this for all anniversary celebrating people...but in any event...i was super impressed with his or the establishment's thoughtfulness:

amuse bouche: foie gras with japanese rice crackers and preserved fruit with a sauce. haha...i should have a better memory. i am not a big fan of foie gras and have always tended to stay away from it since it was liver. but i have to say...it was a delight. first...it was not something we ordered so that was treat #1!!! the texture was really smooth. the taste...inexplicable. i'm assuming it was covered with the rice crackers to give contrast to the texture and taste. tastewise, it was a nice combo. but the rice crackers tended to stick to my teeth so that was not so pleasant. the fruit pairing gave nice balance too.


we ordered crab cakes with edamame (inside) and tofu and potatoes. i think sweet potatoes but i can't remember. the crabe cakes were really good. it was neat to have the edamame inside for a little bit of a crunch. vince also ordered this japanese beer. they have a website called kodawari.ccc. the beer was nice...smooth tasting and not bitter or watery. plus it has a really cute bottle. whoooo would have thought that an owl could be a good logo. haha. i'm clever.



i had to order the filet mignon. half because it's a super great cut of steak. but also because i really like the portion size and money is going to be shelled out...i'd like to think i'm not being too greedy with how much food i will eat. so good size portion for awesome meat. i ordered it medium rare. sooo yummy. the only reason why i like forbes better was because it seemed to be a more consistent taste and texture. maybe b/c it was a different size. who knows. at forbes i think it was 2 4oz pieces. here...i got 2 6oz pieces. and of course, the outside seared to seal in flavor and juices, and the middle...somewhat red. i could taste the seared part and the medium rare part all too distinctly. i hate to be so nit-picky...but i never noticed the difference before. but still...superb filet. vince had the porterhouse. yet another great piece of meat. funny thing was that he ordered it medium...and it was just as red as mine! maybe because it was a bigger piece...who knows. i had a bite of his...and i have to say that filet is sooo soo good. his was tasty too...just a little bit tougher to chew than the filet.


of course, we had to order dessert. and of course, i saw that they had souffle and so i had to order that. it took 20 minutes to make but that's cool. we still had beer and wine to drink. but in the meantime...andrew brought us out these little mini strawberry shortcakes!! i love all things mini!!! it was so thoughtful and a very very nice gesture. he mentioned they were still a bit frozen...so we might want to wait a little bit.

uh---someone didn't wait that long... i didn't even see vince eat it. he says he cut it in half and then ate the halves. it would have been just as easy to pop the whole thing in his mouth. more stealthy. in any event, whether it was standard b/c of the wait for the souffle...or b/c it was our anniversary (as stated by andrew)...what a nice treat #2!!!!

we then got to partake in the vanilla caramel souffle. i don't get to have souffle often...but it was sooo good! really sweet...very fluffy and moist. mmmmmm!!!!



while we were just getting started on our souffle...andrew comes out with treat #3!!!!! soo soo nice. very well presented. i was marvelling at how a little scoop of ice cream could be so wonderfully presented. and...as far as chocolate ice cream goes... it was super tasty!


so then we thought that was it...that we were all done with the treats and the awesome consideration and service. when lo and behold...here comes andrew with something quite interesting. because vince had dined here before, he was not surprised to see what it was, only that it was being brought out to is. not something that was listed on the menu...but great for treat #4...banana cotton candy!! ok, i know, cotton candy is just sugar...but it was so nice. and so fun. there was this little girl at a table next to us that we thought we should give it too b/c it's so fun and young...but then again...she wasn't paying attention and who know what the parents would have thought at strangers offering their child candy. haha.

great dining experience at alexanders. we wondered whether we would get all those treats if we had a bigger party...so maybe we'll have to try it next time. and andrew elevated wait service to a different level as he handed us his card when we were finished and let us know that we could ask to be served by him and then we'd get vip service the next time we were there. will do andrew...you really made us feel special and well fed on our first anniversary!!! thanks!!


of course, the might did not stop there. having been so spoiled with wonderful desserts...we topped off our night with delicious McDonald's hot fudge sundae and vanilla shake. hey...we're equal opportunity dessert eaters!!! and i remember when sundaes were only 39cents.

mmm...i love food.
what a wonderful weekend we had. here's looking to our 2nd year!!!

revelation for me...

so i have been having a dilemma with my job hunting...but i seem to be coming out of the woods. or at least there's light ahead. or at least light...may be a train heading my way. anyhow...i've been toying with the idea of an industry change. no more litigation for me. considering transitioning to corporate law. problem is...i have no corporate experience...can't really go back to school for that...and no one will give me a job in it since i have no experience. what a catch 22. anyhow...for the past year i've been one foot in just staying in litigation...and one foot in considering the change. so i haven't been able to move. just recently...i have become more comfortable in committing to the transition...so hence...the light up ahead. but still...i'm not 100% committed and i'm beginning to see what my problem is.

i think it's because i've never really had to really try hard or suffer for anything. not to say that everything has been easy or i've gotten all that's i've wanted. but i think that my nature is such that i'm pretty easygoing and whatever happens happens. i've always been ok with whatever and accepting of things that do or don't work out. but honestly...i've never had to really work 100% hard or give all of me to achieve something or head some direction. except when it came to my relationship with vince. that, hands down...was the hardest, most effortful, and most reflective time in my life. but things like school, job, material things, time spent...they don't fall in that caliber of putting forth my best effort. i used to wonder what would be different if i actually studied harder in school because i know i could have, in high school, college, and law school. and so now i wonder...if i put in my best effort towards my livelihood...what could happen?

so now what... my revelation is that i've been good at going with the flow and sometimes putting my oars in the water to change my direction and sometimes row a few strokes. but then i think of when those trying to be navy seals have to row their boat past the break of the ocean waves or in all i've learned this year about making marriage work... you have to commit and you have to give it your all. none of this half ass-ness. so now...i'm still not 100% committed to my industry transition...because i'm scared and prideful. i'm scared of not knowing what might happen. i'm scared of failing. i'm scared it's the wrong direction. i'm too proud to go down in the ranks. i'm too proud to do something that seems less than what i was trained to do. but i know now...that i don't want to not even try because i might be scared. ok, putting it more grammatically correct: despite my fear...i have to try. i cannot let my fear paralyze me. because that would be worse than failing. and i know now that my pride can be a huge obstacle. my livelihood does not depend on my title or how other people view me. my livelihood is knowing that i'm doing something worthwhile and enjoyable. what that is...haha..i still don't know...but i don't want to be scared or too proud to get there.

saw this at the stanford mall today. very very cute. everyone who passed by could not help but stare and smile and want one of their own. the owner said it may have been a balance issue after an illness. but it just kept going round and round..even while going straight!!

i was totally thinking of my old friend Jenny who is the champion of all dogs small and cute. i know she'd want to adopt this one!

MMMM...filet mignon wrapped in prosciutto...

Yea! My birthday just passed!! It's funny how one second I feel old and think fondly of how i'm getting older. then the next second...i'm thinking that i'm young and there's still so much ahead left for me to do and see and experience and learn. i think i'll park myself in the second camp. i'd like to never feel like i'm old...even as i get older in years...

so recent thought was that i think it would be cool to never retire. i mean, don't get me wrong...not having a full time job can be great sometimes. but sometimes...it feels mighty boring and lame. but i was thinking recently that i hope, i am at age whatever...when the retirement age is close at hand..., at a job where i can do and enjoy and like doing until i physically or mentally cannot do it anymore. i know many people look forward to retirement and all...and that there are so many things that one can do when retired...but i'd hope that i can enjoy my life during these years as much as i think i might enjoy them after i might retire. why does this thought come when i'm transitioning ages...who knows. maybe i'll feel different later. but for now...that's where i'm at!

so for my birthday...it was awesome!! many birthday wishes...thanks for all of you who remembered!! really that's the best thing. just that people remember and wish me a happy birthday. the weekend was pretty fun. dinner with family...lunch with friends...then work (ok, that part was kind of sucky). but overall...very relaxing and a really great time with vince! we went to eat at a super extraordinary steakhouse called Forbes Mill Steakhouse in Los Gatos. i have to say...i'm not a wine connoisseur or a food savant...but it was the best food i had in ages...if not ever.
i had the best cabernet ever. not too tanin-y...smooth but not as thick or heavy as a merlot. it was from the winery 75 cellar from amber knolls...couldn't tell you what year or anything else specific...but i could drink that wine all day and night! i had ordered a different wine to start with and they gave me a half glass of the 75 cellar on the house just to try and taste.

though it was monday night and the place was somewhat empty...it was still the best dining experience i had ever had. they knew it was my birthday and so they put a little birthday wish on the daily special menu. now i have to say...that probably took an ounce of effort and a millisecond to print out...but it made a huge impact as it was super thoughtful and quite a nice touch. one of the owners, Dean, stopped by our table about 4-5 times during the night to make sure we were ok. and even when i called back to ask about the wine...he was nice and chatty and very friendly. the server we had, jeffrey, was super friendly and not too imposing or anything. attentive enough that we never wondered where he had gone too. even the busing people...they were super nice and always asked if we were ok...very high quality personnel over there.

i had the tournedos and scallops and it was awesome!!!!!
never tasted better. i can never cook scallops to taste the way they did that night. they were warm...and firm but then melted in my mouth!! and the filet...wow...after i finished the first one...i was amazed that i had yet another one to eat. i have to say...just the right amount of indulgence. and you can't go wrong with meat wrapped in meat. i have to say also...vince's huge porterhouse steak was quite mouthwatering too! my pieces were bit larger than the size of a golf ball slightly flattened (about 1.5 times the size of the large scallops)...vince's steak was huge!!!! look at it!!!


and then we got the dessert sampler!!!! yum!!! it was just the right amount of such great desserts!!! there was a lilikoi cheesecake... kona coffee creme brulee...some apple cobbler thing...and then a chocolate torte...MMMMM!!! again...just the right amount of indulgence.

the only down side of that experience...these two "little wanna-be kids" sitting near us. they may have been early twenties or something. they didn't seem like they were on a date (or at least if they were...someone wasn't into the other person) and we hard the guy complain that the ice tea was "a little to sour" so could they take it back and get him another one. well..be that as it may...i have great doubts that the ice tea would be sour...it's ice tea. ok...i'm getting on a tangent. maybe it was sour. maybe it was so sour he couldn't drink it.

anyhow...go there if you are ever up here. you won't regret it. and you can stroll around town before or after dinner. it's such a nice town. such a nice place to spend the afternoon/evening.

i also got my hair cut. it's way expensive to get my hair cut. i need to find a cheaper place!!! tried a new look. not too into it right now. so i'm just going for the wild uncontrollable hair tied back look for the time being.

here's to next year!! thanks to all of you my friends!!!

weekend o'fun

this weekend was awesome!! great weather! great time. it would be nice if every weekend could be like this.

friday night started off with a great time in the city with dinner with ben, nic and avery! it was so nice to see good friends and to see a new little friend again. though the night ended early, it was supremely wonderful to catch up and be together. so of course, on the way home...the inevitable question of "you wanna do something else?" came up. we ended up keeping it lowkey and heading over to our local borders for some enlightening. my form of enlightenment...harry potter and the half blood prince. yes...i'm a closet harry potter fan. no...i don't have my copy reserved yet. but i had forgotten what happened in book 6. it's been relax in some nice enjoyable reading.

saturday we slept in a bit and then went swimming! it was such a nice morning to go. water was cool...no one else in the pool! then headed to lunch at our favorite place, i'll call it...the College. they were grilling today so we had lunch outside. it was soo nice we pondered the thought of whether there was a difference in hanging out at a coffee shop or here at the College. and for us...we thought that hanging out at the College was just the same...if not better. You're not surrounded by strangers in close proximity who can hear every word you say. on nice days as it was on saturday...you can lounge outside in the patio...or if you had beach chairs...on the lawn. if the weather is not cooperating...there are lounges inside to relax in. and there is plenty of sustenance only a few steps away. pretty awesome. so vince and i chatted. relaxed...and just hung around. then later...just as conveniently...we went to go work out with our friends Kenny and Elle. we came home after...had some dinner...and relaxed in front of the tube.

sunday...church...which is always great. we found out that i didn't have to work that afternoon, so it was a brief jaunt around the mall...and then off to the College to the gym. before going to the gym however, we got on some bikes and rode around on the trail. i have to say...actually propelling yourself is much harder than sitting on an exercise bike. it was seriously cold with the with and all...but still...a nice ride. except for the one instance where i couldn't really get on the bike and start pedalling and was twisting and turning trying to avoid falling off...or veering towards the down slope into the creek, all the while vince laughing behind me. i have to say...it was funny...during and afterwards... hey...the bike was tall...my legs are short...and i hadn't been on a bike since 2000. that's my excuse. so then off to a stimulating work out on the machines and weights..and some basketball on the gym tv. pretty nice and relaxing...even it it was exercise. we left...picked up some items at trader joes...and then headed off for home. ending the weekend with a nice glass of wine...or two...or three...was super great.

and now it's monday. which isn't so bad...